Monday, March 5, 2012


All my friends, who are getting married this year are broadly classified into two categories. a) Ones getting married before me, b) Ones getting married after me.

But seriously, whats with all the weddings? School friends, college mates, colleagues, acquaintances, family friends. Wedding bells everywhere, every week. I don't see any weekend in the near future where I've to eat home made food. And there is variety too, hindu marriages, muslim weddings, christian weddings, arrange marriages, love marriages, even register"ed" marriages. I suppose the rumor, about the world ending in 2012 is having its effects, or is it something like the Arab springs where one wedding gives a signal for the others in the group that its time. I think I'm part of that generation which is in the "find a partner" stage. Most of us, who couldn't get into top universities in and out of the country after graduation and are too cozy in the current job to think of a shift, are now moving in to the next phase of life. The settled life. But can life ever be "settled"?

In fact, everything is unsettled even before the wedding. Your routine, diet, dressing, music playlists, everything goes for a toss. Even mobile bills are unsettled. Literally. Its not only you, people around you are unsettled. All of a sudden there is this special interest by family members in how much you eat, what you wear, length of your hair. Some people say you look fat, some people say you look slim. Few people suggest the parlor, others suggest the gym. Notice the rhyming there??? Even friends and colleagues are in on the fun. The bachelors look at you with pity and the married look at you with a grin. Every smile, every mistake, every success, every comment, every mis step is inevitably force linked to your partner, which is not completely untrue.

The engagement marks the beginning of this unsettlement. It starts with the engagement dress. All this time you would have come across so many suits that look so damn great, but when you go out to get one, they all seem to be hidden or sold the day before you started out. The number of people coming with you for shopping makes all the difference. If you ask me, 3-5 is the best number, including yourself. Less than that, you'll end up getting something that only you and your spouse (if she is sweet enough) would like. More than that and you will end up losing time and patience and finally get something that you'll start to hate even before you bill it. After all that, if you manage to get something you like, Dad says its too unorthodox, Mom says it doesn't suit the skin color, Grandma doesn't like the tie, you end up hating your own face. (especially in my case due to some last minute skin treatments). After this, the wedding preparations begin. Here, you start to appreciate the Indian government and the way they are able to pass bills in the parliament or make decisions, whereas a family of single digit members find it difficult to select a wedding card.

But something that shines through all this is the genuine happiness and enthusiasm of all family and friends. New family members, new friends, more treats, friendly comments, wedding purchases, more wedding purchases, printing invitations, family photos, travel plans, leave applications and more wedding purchases. Every one is excited and its contagious. As the wait nears its end, everything seems perfect. The pink tie, the bad make up, the font on the wedding card, the stage, the rings. This period of happiness and joy gives hope for better times ahead. Great times, filled with love and companionship. To share this ordinary life with someone extraordinary.

 Some days are long, some days are short,
Most days i dream... (dot dot dot)